Some things are just too incredible not to share. This mom sat down to Facebook one day and decided to write about something that was very close to her heart. It was originally written in French, but has since then been translated into English and many other languages due to how powerful her words are. When you have a child with disabilities, well-meaning comments from friends and family might turn out to be incredibly hurtful. Instead of lashing out at the people who make these comments, she decides to explain to everyone what you should never say to a parent about their child. Ever. This is amazing.
Translated from French:
Here is my baby girl, Louise. She is four months old, has two legs, two arms, and one extra chromosome.
Please, when you meet a Louise, do not ask her mother, “How come you did not find out during pregnancy?”
Either it was, and the parents took the decision to “keep the baby”. Or it wasn’t, and it was a surprise that they don’t necessarily want to keep discussing.
Bear in mind that mothers have a tendency to feel guilty about each and every thing, so a surprising extra chromosome… I let you guess.
Don’t tell her mother “it’s your baby, no matter what.” No. It’s my baby, full stop. Plus, “Nomatterwhat,” is quite an ugly name, I’d rather call her Louise.
Don’t tell her mother, “As she a Down’s baby, she will… etc.” No. She is a four-month-old baby who happens to have Down’s Syndrome.
It’s not what she IS, it’s what she HAS. You wouldn’t say “she’s a cancer baby.”
Don’t say “they’re like this, they’re like that.”
“They” all have their features, their character, their own tastes, their life. “They” are as different from each other as you are from you neighbour.
I know that if you haven’t experienced it, you don’t necessarily think too hard about it but words do matter. They can comfort and they can hurt.
So just give it a thought, especially if you ‘re a doctor or a nurse of any kind.
I usually do not make my status “public” on Facebook, but this one will be.
You can read it and share it as you want.
Because each year there are (in France) 500 new “mothers of Louise ” that can have a day ruined by those kind of words.
I know it’s not meant to hurt. But you just need to know.
Her words are so incredibly true! We would never intentionally say something to hurt the parent of a child with Down’s Syndrome, but too often we might not even realize that what we say might not be taken the way we thought it would. Being sensitive and caring is one thing, but how will we learn if no one ever tells us why we shouldn’t say a certain phrase? I am going to read this again and make sure that I never say anything like this to another parent! EVER!
To see more inspiring videos, articles, and uplifting content, check out Happy Tango every day! If you loved what you saw here then like and share this with the links below!