Relationships are hard. They can go stale without constant work from both parties. Sometimes, a relationship might feel overbearing when one person tries extremely hard to keep it alive while the other let’s it dwindle into nothing. A lot of times, a relationship can die from neglect when both people don’t try to do anything out of their routine. Other times, it can fizzle out before anyone realizes what has happened. For this couple, none of those options were acceptable, and the way they rediscovered their spark is just too cute!
“So, how do you develop a relationship?” This question was asked of me when I was doing a Relationship Service seminar for the YMCA. I have to admit that the question caught me off guard for a brief second. We had been talking “theory” all day and this woman wanted some concrete methods for developing client or, for that matter, any relationship.
After pausing for a minute to collect my thoughts, I stated that the only thing I could do was tell her the truth from my experience. Somewhat shyly, I began to tell her the story of how my wife and I saved our relationship. My mind flashed back to a time when Karen and I were at a State Fair and I won two red velvet hearts as a consolation prize in one of the midway games. I broke apart the two hearts and gave one to Karen and kept one for myself.
We had been married 10 years and we were going through a bit of a “flat spot” in our relationship. We still loved each other, but something was missing.
Karen did not want the “flatness” to continue so one day she came up with a plan. She took one of the hearts and hid it in my towel while I was taking a shower. When I went to grab my towel, the red heart spilled out. As I bent down to pick it up, I was overcome with a rush of emotion that made me flash back to the time when I won the red hearts and the love we felt for each other at that moment.
I then hid the heart in her sock drawer. She hid it in my underwear drawer. I hid it in the refrigerator. She wrapped it in plastic wrap and hid it in the peanut butter. Hiding the heart became as much fun as finding it. Each time we hid or found it was a moment to be treasured, like the first moment we fell in love or the first moment we kissed or the first moment we looked into our child’s eyes. Each is a cherished and precious moment.
How do you develop a relationship? One moment at a time!”
While this exact scenario might not work for everyone, the principal is the same! Find something meaningful to the both of you – a favorite song, a favorite vacation, a heartfelt moment – and try to recreate it as often as possible. Pretty soon, you’ll be making new memories and the days of monotony will quickly be left behind! What would you do to rekindle a fading romance? This method is adorable and might just lead to new and exciting adventures!
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