They were at a birthday party for a mutual friend. Her boyfriend had had a few too many and began to display some disappointing behavior. She wasn’t drinking because she planned to drive them home and had stepped outside for some air. She came back in to stand behind her boyfriend and overheard him saying some horrible things…
He was talking to some girl and I heard her ask, “So is that girl you came in with your girlfriend?” And he distinctly said after some hesitation, “No, she’s just my roommate haha.” I got really pissed off but didn’t say anything, just came up to stand next to him. I didn’t want to make a scene at my friend’s birthday party, but he was going to get an earful when we left. He didn’t even notice me for a few seconds and said something like, “You’re so pretty,” to the other girl. She noticed me glaring at him and left.
My friend, the host of the party, came up to me and asked me if my boyfriend and I had broken up and she didn’t know, because she had heard him telling somebody that he was single.
After that, I just decided to go home. I was really mad. He could find a ride or crash at our friend’s place. I went home without saying a word to him. This morning I woke up to all of these texts and calls from him really pissed that I ditched him at the party without a ride or without warning. He demanded to know in an accusing voice “where I had disappeared off to,” as if I was the one up to something shady.
I texted him, “You made it clear last night that you are single. I don’t wait around for ex-boyfriends to give them rides home. Don’t bother coming back here.” He immediately tried to call me and I didn’t pick up. Then he texted, “Wtf are you talking about???”
He stuck to his guns and claimed he never said any of that stuff.
I had a feeling he was going to pretend he doesn’t remember or blacked out as a way to get out of it. He told me he was getting a ride back to my place. I considered not opening the door. But what if he really didn’t remember? I did decide to answer the door and hear what he had to say, if only to try to understand his reasons behind it. I wanted to understand.
At first he denied it and said that none of it ever happened, and that my friend was lying to me because she was jealous of us and had always “wanted him.” He said he had no idea what she was talking about or why I was so mad at him. I just said, “I heard you say it, too.” He said, “Say what???” But then he just saw the look on my face and crumbled. He said that prior to us dating, he had never gotten attention from girls before and it went to his head when it happened last night. He said that he’d always felt “in disbelief” because he believed I was out of his league and it was pure fluke that I’d ever been interested in him. Apparently girls never approached him before we were dating, ever, so when it happened at the party he “didn’t know how to react.”
He said he “enjoyed the attention for once in his life and just went with it.” According to him he wasn’t planning on doing anything but just impulsively said whatever to keep the attention coming. He swears up and down that he just enjoyed the ego boost that came from girls being interested in him, but he would never ever cheat on me. In his mind he thought it was “harmless” because he knew he would never let it go further than feeding his ego, and that if he’d known that I would hear, he never would have done it and risked hurting me.
I want a guy who can handle when some other girl shows interest in him with maturity and respect. Someone who’s proud to point at me and say “Sorry, I’m taken and she’s a great girl!” with no regrets.
He broke down crying too and begged me to please try to forgive him because it was a stupid drunken mistake. It was so hard to stay strong, but I was very angry with him. I said I was glad he realized his mistake, but if he really “loved me more than anyone” than he really needed a better way to show it than pretending I don’t exist to other pretty girls. He got hysterical and just started saying, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I can’t lose you! Please forgive me!”
So I told him to get out and not talk to me anymore. I’m leaving a box of his stuff on the porch so he can get it without talking to me. Then I laid my couch and cried with my dog until I felt sick. We had an amazing year together and it sucks that something so small and stupid could cause him to jeopardize that. I don’t want to be with a guy who values our relationship so little.
I feel better today. It sucks not being in a relationship anymore but I feel like I deserve better. He’s been blowing up my phone saying he’s been at home crying and he loves me so much. I’m just waiting for him to pick up his stuff so I can block his number.
My best friend also just broke up with his girlfriend of 2 years, so we’re planning a road trip together to take our mind off things. I wasn’t able to go before because I didn’t want to make my boyfriend uncomfortable (go figure). But this weekend I’m going to go hang out with my bestie and swim at the beach and forget things. I have a lot of hate and bitterness in my heart right now but I’m hoping that will pass.
The story went viral because most people would have given him another chance. Not because they believed him, but because it is so hard to change a routine. Time after time, people “stick with the devil they know” instead of standing up for themselves. People were in awe of her strength. There were no second chances.
But others criticized how she wouldn’t give him a second chance because “everyone makes mistakes.” Do you think she did the right thing, or do you agree with others that she “overreacted.”
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