One Cat Decides To Explain “Life” To The New Kitten. It Would Be Funny If It Wasn’t So TRUE!

People have devoted their lives to discover what different animals are thinking. Testing and prodding, they want to know if other animals can process information like we can – or if the possibility is even there, if they are given the right tools. Obviously, since there isn’t another animal keeping humans in cages and doing strange experiments, we can safely say that there isn’t another predator to be worried about…but we can’t really test for everything. This cat has it all figured out. And it’s kind of…well, sad.

Good afternoon there fellow feline. Enjoying a nice bit of sun, aren’t you? Let me join you. Our human works fairly well as a food dispenser lately, doesn’t he? Walk in front of him, break the eye contact with his glowing box, and chances are he’ll get up and feed you. It works wonders.

But on to the matter at hand. I overheard a most amusing rumor today. You know how our human tends to be out of the house during most of the day? It seems he spends his day in a building, staring at another glowing box. Not because he wants to, but because some other human tells him to. No, I don’t really know what the difference is, but I’ve been told that the glowing box in here is for fun, while the glowing box in the other building is not fun. Perhaps the other one is already deceased, while this one is still alive.

Anyway – and here’s the crux of the matter – the human in the other building gives him food for looking at the glowing box. Not just people food either, cat food too. The fellow I heard it from – Shnookums from down the street – assured me his human acquires car food as well. I told him that’s the silliest jibber-jabber I’ve heard all week. Yet, he insists. He also speculated that the fun glowing box would not work if the human does not stare at the boring glowing box for eight hours a day, but he wasn’t entirely sure of this himself.

Needless to say, I left him to his mad ravings – poor ol’ chap must be starting to lose his marbles – and came down here to enjoy this exquisite spot of sunlight.

Because in the end, we’d probably all prefer to be lounging in a patch of sunlight instead of working day in and day out just to pay bills. Maybe the cats aren’t on our level intellectually…but I know there are some days when I would love to just trade it all in and become a cat instead. Or is that just me? Move over kitty, that spot of sunlight sounds heavenly. Who needs glowing boxes anyway.

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