Have you ever wondered what goes through your dog’s mind? Seemingly unprovoked barking at 2A.M., frantic panting, curious looks…well, a group of strangers got together and came up with a hilarious list of reasons why their dogs would (probably) call 911, and we have to agree that these are the absolute BEST!
DOG: Hello, 911?! Somebody parked my neighbor’s car at my neighbor’s house and now they’re going INSIDE my neighbor’s house! I’m barking, but what else can I do?!
911: Run back and forth from the living room couch to the front door, it should help.
DOG: Hello, 911?! I’d like to report missing humans!
911: How long have they been missing?
DOG: Somewhere between 5 minutes and 2 years, I don’t really know, I have no sense of time!
911: Okay, what you’ll need to do is run around and bark. Then, continually scratch at the door until you create a hole big enough to escape your inevitable death and find your humans.
DOG: Hello, 911?! There is a human outside of my house!
911: Are they trying to break in?
DOG: No, but they are outside of my house!
911: Are they on your property?
DOG: No, but they’re outside of my house! I can see them!
911: Alright, be sure to leave a lot of nose-prints on your front window while you’re barking. There isn’t much else we can do.
DOG: Hello, 911?! My human is being nice to a cat!
911: We’re sending backup!
DOG: Hello, 911?! My human came home and is being followed by another human!
911: First, start barking. Can you identify the second human?
DOG: It looks like my other human and smells like my other human and sounds like my other human – oh, wait, it’s my other human! Thank goodness, I thought it was a murderer!
DOG: HELP! THERE ARE HORSES ON THE TELEVISION!
911: Where is your human?!
DOG: THEY’RE COMING CLOSER! I’M BARKING BUT THEY WON’T STOP! WE’RE GONNA DIE!
911: Keep calm, the horses will stop if you launch yourself at the television.
DOG: OKAY THANK YOU!
It sounds like my dog may have made most of these phone calls himself…