You know that feeling that you get when you think you’ve just gotten into trouble? It’s the icy tingle that shoots down your spine when you get an email from your boss that just says: “see me.” It’s the chill that starts at the top of your head and rushes down to your feet when red and blue lights start flashing behind you on the highway. That sinking feeling starts in your throat and plummets down to the pit of your stomach when a phone call starts with “we need to talk.”
Now imagine how much worse it must be if you thought it was GOD talking to you. I’m amazed this guy didn’t just pass out on the floor.
He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said, “Jesus knows you’re here.”
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. He must be paranoid. There was no way God was talking to him. When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard a voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
“Did you say that?” he hissed at the parrot.
“Yep”, the parrot confessed, then squawked, “I’m just trying to warn you that he is watching you.”
The burglar relaxed. “Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?”
“I’m Moses.” replied the bird.
“Moses?” the burglar laughed. “What kind of people would name a bird Moses?”
“The same kind of people that would name their Rottweiler Jesus.”
This kind of shock? This is pure dread. He knows what’s coming, and there’s no way to stop it! I’d much rather get an ominous email from the boss than be face to face with a territorial canine! Eek!
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